Impulse – The Intuition Poser

I’ve been talking quite a bit about the role of intuition in parenting. But, while we were on vacation, I realized that it’s important to acknowledge an evil intuition wanna-be, a poser – impulse…

Restaurant high chairs have never been a happy place for AE. But, in her ever-growing need for independence, she now downright refuses to sit in them. Before we even left for vacation, I started to talk to her about mealtime.

“We’re going to be eating in restaurants for most of our meals. Do you know what that means? AE is going to sit in the big seat at the table.”

To which she happily replies, “Eat in big seat?!?!?!”

“Yes. And remember, when you sit in the big seat, you stay at the table with mommy and daddy while we’re eating.”

“No running,” she responded.

Now, we did partially acknowledge her limits. We didn’t ask her to sit at the table during the time when we were waiting for food to arrive. We ordered our food, then one of us left the table with her. Derek took her on walks. I took her to the bathroom. And, when the food arrived, we all sat down to eat. Or, at least that was the plan.

Some meals were better than others (particularly those meals where there was some visual entertainment for AE – characters, a shark swimming in a wall- to-wall living coral reef, a view of the castle or even the kitchen). But, there were many, many meals during our week where my plate was filled with warm, delicious eats and AE took off running from the table.

At each meal, my patience barometer dropped while my frustration barometer soared. As I was chasing AE during a meal mid-week, I could feel a heat building up inside. Little thoughts started to bubble to the surface.

“Other people’s kids seem to be sitting at the table. Why won’t mine? Maybe I’m doing something wrong.”

“If she gets up from the table one more time, I’m going to explode!”

“I need to get in her face and tell her what I expect from her, what good girls do!”

Impulses. Each one of them.

These were not the still waters of my intuition’s leading. These were the turbulent seas of knee-jerk reactions. These were not decisions born out of contemplation. They were responses void of much thought at all.

And, the biggest difference between acting from intuition and impulse is how I feel afterwards. There is a peace that covers my entire being when I’ve acted from intuition – even if the choice was hard. But, my impulsive responses often leave me full of remorse.

Impulse disguises itself pretty well. Much like intuition, it can arise from a physical place in my body. It can feel effortless, easy to do. It can even seem like there is no other choice.

But, my intuition’s leading doesn’t change in five minutes. Intuition will patiently wait for a few deep breaths. It will be there waiting when I walk away for a moment. It will build up and enhance my relationships, not chip away at their foundations.

And, if I can just remember to look for those signposts in the moment, it even has the ability to rip off impulse’s disguise and expose it as the poser it is.

How do you tell the difference between your intuition and an impulse? I’d love to hear!