Mama on the Mat

There is no doubt that my yoga practice profoundly affects my parenting. When I take care of myself on the mat, I’m better able care for my daughter and the little man growing in my belly. My practice also slows me down, allowing me to be present with my family.

But, I’ve also taken one of my favorite yoga practices off the mat and adopted it in my role as mama. I always begin my own practice and all classes I teach with an intention. I decide upon it while I’m centering and I ponder it throughout my time on the mat. It helps me stay focused and present with my body.

Increasingly, I’m finding that many of the intentions that I use on the mat, also apply beautifully to parenting. One of my favorite intentions on the mat is the harder something is, the more it requires my softness. When I’m in a challenging yoga pose, it’s so easy to tense every part of my body, but this never yields positive results. Instead, if I can soften and relax my non-working muscles and slow my breathing, amazing things happen.

AE has a pretty happy disposition. She smiles, laughs and happily plays most of the time. But, like most toddlers, at least once a day, she comes completely undone. These episodes are normal, age-appropriate expressions of intense frustration and anger.

When one of these episodes occurs, it is tempting to respond with an equal measure of anger, after all they usually happen at the most inconvenient times. But, if I respond out of my own anger, the episode not only continues, it magnifies.

Instead, I try to remember the intention that has served me so well on the yoga mat. I pause, consider how hard it is for me as an adult to manage big emotions and desires that cannot be fulfilled. Then, I find myself softening toward my toddler. When I literally relax my body, my tone and my words, AE does the same. From that place, together we are able connect and explore appropriate limits and solutions.

Yes, in my role as mama, the harder something is, the more it requires my softness. 

What are your favorite parenting intentions? How do you find softness when life around you is hard? Tell me in the comments!