A Chronic Sense of Urgency
For many years, I lived with a condition best described as a chronic sense of urgency. My schedule was so full that I was always on the go. When I wasn’t physically running from one place to the next, my mind was.
While I’m happy to say that my regular routine no longer activates this disorder, I have occasional “flare-ups” when the day’s schedule is too full. And when I am battling a chronic sense of urgency, I act as if everything is an emergency.
Something as simple as going to the store to get milk becomes a dramatic trigger for my fight or flight response. I speed on my way to the store. I fight for a close parking space. I hurry past anyone in my path. I grab the milk and rush to get through the checkout. When an innocent bystander is making casual small talk with the cashier, I give them the evil eye.
By the time I get back into the car, I am having the same physiological response as if I had just outrun a hungry tiger. Of course this is terrible for my body, but more than anything, my relationships suffer when I’m in a constant hurry. I fail to listen. I lack patience. I am unable to connect.
When I find myself having one of these flare-ups, I consciously choose to stop and take inventory of my schedule and my attitude.
I look for things on my calendar and my to do list that I can eliminate.
I add rest to my routine.
I practice yoga poses that slow me down.
Sometimes, I even choose to do everything ten percent slower than normal (just try brushing your teeth 10% slower today – it’s a great practice).
I really like the wife, mom, daughter, friend and human being I am when I am able to overcome this false sense of urgency.
Do you suffer from a chronic sense of urgency? What do you do to slow down? I’d love to hear from you in the comments.
I love this post! I battle this more than I like to admit and am trying to be intentional about slowing down my near trot to a more measured pace and listening to others very deliberately with my full attention. Life-long habits die hard so I am reminding myself that it is a journey. Thanks for the challenge, Jen!
Yes. Yes, I suffer from a chronic sense of urgency. And I don’t know how to avoid it. I necessarily work full time. I have a son with ADHD which takes up huge amounts of time, energy, and, ironically, attention. A husband who is underemployed full time and plays in two bands, so he’s not as available as I would like. Just a lot of pressure and requirements on my shoulder. Oh, and I’m a den leader, too. (It was that or let the den die.) I keep trying to find a solution, but so far…it has remained elusive.
Oh huge virtual hugs, Dee. I can only imagine how difficult it must be. One thing that always helps me is to take “small breaks” that slow me down. Like, when I’m sitting in traffic or standing in line at the grocery store, making dinner or even while I’m giving my daughter a bath- I do a few rounds of a breathing exercise that calms me. I do a normal inhalation, and then I imagine I’m exhaling through a straw. It makes the exhale longer than than the inhale, which is calming for our nervous system.
I’ve also been known to read my daughter books while I’m inverted in feet-up-the wall (though not now while I’m pregnant) or practicing a simple seated forward bend (they are calming for the nervous system). Hope these ideas inspire some relief for you!
“The Tyranny of the Urgent”- my mom had me read it! Yes, I do find myself falling into that and my relationships do suffer. It makes you turn inward and forget to focus on others.
I did Savasana twice last week. I have never slept so good- and have never woke up so cheerful! I also love deep breathing. I breathe in and picture the oxygen going through all my muscle fibers, relaxing them completely.
Yay! Yay! Yay, Joye! I’m over the moon excited to hear that!